Do I have to be Catholic to attend:

Not at all. Everyone is welcome to attend, but we will lock the doors and you can’t leave until you say 10 Hail Mary’s and five Our Father’s in English, Aramaic, Latin and Swahili.

Bring the Kids!

Subliminal message: BOOK NOW Email NOW RichardLaneMinistries@gmail.com

Are children able to attend:

If you are 2 years old or 102 years old, you are invited. If you are younger or older you might need a ride.

Do I have to attend all the days:

YES or you will end up in Purgatory! No you do not have to attend all the days, but each session builds off the previous.

What is a Parish Mission:

A Parish Mission is like a Breath of fresh air from the Holy Spirit for a Parish. It is three to four days of motivating, informative and engaging talks by one of the foremost leading Lay Catholic Evangelist in the United States.

Rejoicing in the Lord

– Brings about unity in a Parish

– Clearer understanding of Catholic Teachings

– Substantive information to live the Gospel daily

– Applied Theology; how to apply the scriptures to daily life


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Book Richard NOW! Book Richard NOW! Click me and BOOK NOW!

Are Parish Missions only for Lent and Advent:

Definitely not. Parish missions are year-round, teaching the faith, encountering others and energizing membership.

How long are the missions:

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I promise I’m not sleeping!

Most missions are four days in length. Each night is approximately one hour long. If the parish has a large (40 or more) daily Mass attendance then it is recommended we conduct morning and evening sessions. If you want longer, I am more than willing to preach until you drop!


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EMAIL NOW – EMAIL – NOW – CLICK TO EMAIL NOW Subliminal Subliminal… you know you want to click!

Do you do anything for the youth:

Um, YEAH. I like talking with kids more than adults. At least the kids will ask questions and be engaging and will SMILE and LAUGH instead of sleeping, looking at their watch, or playing Sudoku pretending to take notes.

Do I need to bring anything:

Bring your bible or steal, I mean BORROW one.

YES… yourSELF and a Bible. You know that book that is on ‘display’ in your home that does not

get used. B.I.B.L.E. = Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth! It’s a great book OPEN IT!


How do I begin to read the Bible:

Praying together = Staying together!

Try OPENING IT FIRST! But do NOT try to read it like a normal book; start to finish. You will be stir crazy by the time you get to Leviticus. This is a book where you can start out past the middle portion. Start out with Ephesians, then Galatians, Romans, the Gospel of John, Matthew. Then you will be in a rhythm.



You know you want to email… CLICK NOW… subliminally.

What else should I do when I read the Bible:

I pray you please click the link, email and book him NOW… Amen. Woof Woof.

PRAY! Say a prayer to the Holy Spirit before you start. “Holy Spirit, please help me. I have never done this before and I am terrified. Please show me what I need. Oh and thank You Holy Spirit. Amen.” It’s not Rocket Science… it’s only eschatological and anthropomorphically challenging, within the realm of proper hermeneutics exegesis. You know… the basic stuff!

Is there anything else I need to know:

Yes. EMAIL NOW and BOOK NOW because someone else is going to take your date! Stop waiting and email NOW! RichardLaneMinistries@gmail.com Email NOW and we’ll leave the light on for you!

Thank you for reading these wonderful questions. If you have anymore questions… just email and book the guy please!!!


(and this was not subliminal)

Any donations would truly help continue this missionary work throughout the United States and abroad. Please also consider a monthly donation. Thank you again and know that you are in our prayers daily.